英语幽默小故事

疑神疑鬼

Smith got up in the middle of the night and saw something white in the garden. It seemed to be moving towards the house. “That’s a thief!” he thought. He took his gun and shot at him. Then he went back to bed and fell asleep again, because he was too frightened to go out of the house in the dark.

The next morning, Smith went out and saw one of his own white shirts hanging on the clothes line in the garden. His wife had washed it the day before and hung it out to dry. Now it had a bullet-hole right through the middle of it.

好奇伤身

While Miles waited at the airport to board his plane, he noticed a computer scale that would give your weight and a fortune. He dropped a quarter in the slot, and the computer screen displayed: “You weight 195 pounds, you’re married and you’re on your way to San Diego.” Miles stood there dumbfounded.

Another man put in a quarter and the computer read: “You weigh 184 pounds, you’re divorced and you’re on your way to Chicago.”

Miles said to the man, “Are you divorced and on your way to Chicago?” “Yes,” came the reply.

Miles was amazed. Then he rushed to the men’s room, changed his clothes and put on dark glassed. He went to the machine again. The computer read: “You still weigh 195 pounds, you’re still married. And you just missed your plane to San Diego.”

他是谁

George went to the bath-house to have a bath. The attendant asked him to solve a riddle. “Please tell me who he is. He is not my brother, and nor is my sister, but he is a child of my parents.”

George thought for a long time. At last he said. “I don’t know.”

The attendant laughed and said to him, “It’s me!”

George liked the riddle very much. When he go home, he said to his wife, “Jenny, tell me who he is. He is not my brother, and neither is my sister, but he is a child of my parents.”

Jenny didn’t know. George had such a good laugh that he seemed to lose his breath, “You don’t know? He is the attendant of the bath-house.”

疑神疑鬼

Smith got up in the middle of the night and saw something white in the garden. It seemed to be moving towards the house. “That’s a thief!” he thought. He took his gun and shot at him. Then he went back to bed and fell asleep again, because he was too frightened to go out of the house in the dark.

The next morning, Smith went out and saw one of his own white shirts hanging on the clothes line in the garden. His wife had washed it the day before and hung it out to dry. Now it had a bullet-hole right through the middle of it.

好奇伤身

While Miles waited at the airport to board his plane, he noticed a computer scale that would give your weight and a fortune. He dropped a quarter in the slot, and the computer screen displayed: “You weight 195 pounds, you’re married and you’re on your way to San Diego.” Miles stood there dumbfounded.

Another man put in a quarter and the computer read: “You weigh 184 pounds, you’re divorced and you’re on your way to Chicago.”

Miles said to the man, “Are you divorced and on your way to Chicago?” “Yes,” came the reply.

Miles was amazed. Then he rushed to the men’s room, changed his clothes and put on dark glassed. He went to the machine again. The computer read: “You still weigh 195 pounds, you’re still married. And you just missed your plane to San Diego.”

他是谁

George went to the bath-house to have a bath. The attendant asked him to solve a riddle. “Please tell me who he is. He is not my brother, and nor is my sister, but he is a child of my parents.”

George thought for a long time. At last he said. “I don’t know.”

The attendant laughed and said to him, “It’s me!”

George liked the riddle very much. When he go home, he said to his wife, “Jenny, tell me who he is. He is not my brother, and neither is my sister, but he is a child of my parents.”

Jenny didn’t know. George had such a good laugh that he seemed to lose his breath, “You don’t know? He is the attendant of the bath-house.”


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